Imagine being lied to your entire life. Imagine thinking that you are already set up in this world to fail, just because of the pigment in your skin and the inner workings of your mind.
Is that what I have been taught my entire life? To hate my very existence? To be scared of the police? To be afraid of who I am? To assimilate and conform to whiteness? Is that what I have been taught? For the most part, yes. I have been taught that my skin is a weapon. I have been taught to work harder than any white person who is working half as hard as me to even be considered. I have been taught to be equal and to strive to be just as good, if not better than the white man or woman. I have been taught, conditioned and brain-washed to think that my very existence relies on the expectations and goals of white people. I have been taught to hate who I am because of the media, outer influences and this world that so desperately wants me to fail and crawl back to a country where I was stolen from in the first place.
Fuck all of that.
I’m honestly mad that I had to go to college to understand all of this. I’m mad they make college so unaffordable and I’m mad as hell that I’ve been living my life without exactly knowing why I am the way I am or why my people are the way that they are. It’s so much deeper. People shouldn’t even strive for equality honestly. I do not want to be like any of these white people; especially now. I’m finally understanding how equip I am for the world around me. Not to mention, we were the people that first walked this earth and everyone knows it. They taint our history books with lies and expect us to never find out? All lies come to the surface and that’s a fact. The fact of the matter is that my people; BLACK people are the ones who created this so called “America” yet we’re at the bottom of the fucking pyramid because of a system that was put into place to always benefit whiteness. This is a global phenomenon of thinking.
We have to change our thinking.
If I knew exactly how my mind functioned when I was younger, I would’ve never had any insecurities or been remotely scared. I would’ve always held my head up high and been proud of myself. Something that I realized today was that my social intelligence is heighted– it allows me to empathize and feel everything at a more heightened level. Most of my life I pondered why I was like this because it was almost like I could feel everything; other people’s emotions, empathy and spiritual senses. I’ve always been skeptical about my abilities to read people and to experience second-hand sadness and predict particular situations because of my higher sense of intuition. Thankfully, I am the way I am for a reason. It’s biologically the way I was made that allows me to be this unique and divine person. The skin that I’m in allows me to feel certain things that white people cannot so why would I ever expect them to empathize with me? Life itself is a huge question mark. The real tea is that white people need us. They needed us to build this country because they couldn’t do it themselves. They need us because they feel the need to compare us to their selves.
Do not be mis-informed.
They’re here because of us.