Being Broke

I really wish I understood the value of money better. I wish I knew why pieces of paper controlled the economy. I don’t understand the majority of this. I never believed that money could buy happiness, but what if it can? We literally pay to have a good time, to learn about ourselves and to better our own futures. Why the fuck does that even cost money? It may seem like I’m asking a lot of questions… I am. I don’t understand why we live in a taxed world ran by the ugliest human on this Earth and I have to pay to figure what lies in the decency of our so dearly loved and cherished “Amerikkka”  I do not respect the make-believe morals of this country and I do not/will not stand for it’s fuckin’ fake-ass liberty. None of this makes sense.

Why am I even paying for college? I’m broke as hell. I’m salvaging scholarships and shaking all the piggy banks deep in my garage just so I can maybe live in the city and pay to go to college there, just to TRY to better myself and maybe help this world. Honestly, I’m ranting. I’m not broke. I am just a lazy African-American teenager who wishes I could sit on my ass and have my parents pay my way through all four years of college.

Sheesh, what a concept. A lazy fucking American that complains and complains and lacks so much substance and character,, yikes. I’m definitely not that. But, I still can’t say I’m broke if I have all the resources to succeed, sitting on my lap or on my counter. I don’t know. Negativity is so easy to get wrapped up in and it’ll consume you whole if you let it. I’m asking myself now “how badly do I want to succeed?” Pretty fucking bad, but is it enough? Maybe.

In truth, I’m pretty sure God or some higher power has a plan for me considering how many times I could have offed myself (tmi, I’m not that depressing anymore, don’t worry) but I really think that I could change this world. I’m not really sure how I’m going to change it, but I have some ideas.

This world is ugly, gentrification is on the rise in so many cities in California, Donald Trump is our fucking president and I just read a Buzzfeed post that said some senator in Canada wants to warn us and “save the generation” because we have 59 days until Global Warming hits. Jeez, what a time to be alive.

-Help thy neighbor 

2 Comments Add yours

  1. I love how you wrote this. Very relatable. 🙂


    1. The Violet Hour says:

      thank you!! 💓

      Liked by 1 person

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